Slept in as Alex is sick. Couldn't take her swimming as she is quite bad. Hopefully Jane and myself don't get it for Christmas. I rode to work as the weather seems to be on the improve but I do feel very flat. I wonder if that really hard ride at Taupo has taken more out of me than I think.
I really have to sit down and plan my day to day activities better, try and complete my training to show the signs of improvement I want to happen, and just get a bit of structure into my life other than the sporadic unstructured format I currently live in. Part of it is habit, part of it is laziness, part of it is motivation. I didn't lose 40kg by doing it sporadically. I need to take control of my life and actions.
Long term goal setting time soon. What do I really want out of the next 12 months, 5 years etc?
I rode home and checked on the girls. Everyone is tired, not in any shape to get any quality training in today.
I have suffered from depression for a very long time, probably since I was a teenager. I have struggled with many aspects of my life to do the right thing, make the right choices etc. and now I am trying to be better. I acknowledged I had depression and did nothing about it. It took someone who I deeply respected to tell me they too had depression and they got medical to help, to finally seek actual real help. I am now and finally making real progress. Don't wait to get help!
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